FREAKING OUT!!!

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I am on the edge of freaking out this morning and to think I thought I was super nervous last night. That was nothing compared to how I feel this morning. NOTHING!!!

I keep trying to tell myself it will be fine, that you will finally have some answer. However, after visiting with the doctor the other day I am now really worried about what the results of this test will mean for my future. The doctor really scared me when he said that if this is a hernia and he did the surgery I would most likely die. If it is not the hernia things did not sound much better. 

I guess I need to try telling myself that if it is a hernia maybe I can use that result to get my gastric bypass fixed and that if I can lose enough weight the hernia surgery will be back on the table. Time for me to start getting ready for today.